Turning Things Beautiful
My Dear Lovelians,
For those of you who have not been keeping up with my letters from day one, though I applaud you if you have (*cough Mom *cough cough), my very first letter relayed my heart behind starting this blog to begin with. When all this began, I wanted to recycle beauty back into the world by taking note of the wonderful moments in life around me, big or small. My original goal was to use Dear Old World “as a pair of glasses to help you see the world a little prettier” (ref.) instead of only feeding your mind again with the doom and gloom of current events. I do not mean to downplay the significance of these events nor encourage ignorance. However, I also understand the necessity of balance. Feed your mind with only one side, and this becomes your reality, which is unhealthy at either end of the spectrum. I for one choose to believe there is beauty and goodness in the world alongside the heartache if I only take the time to notice. This is Dear Old World.
So where am I going with this? Well, as the months have progressed, I have come to another understanding. Sometimes, no matter how hard I look for a real smile or gesture of kindness from those I encounter, they and those like them can be, well, hard to find. Separation is painful; people at work can be irritating, customer and co-worker alike; adapting is uncomfortable as newness can be scary and lonely. These sorts of occurrences take their toll on joy and more often than not switch on Survival Mode. I realize now I need to be more than one who searches for magic, in all its symbolic sense. After all, the term I coined Lovelian means one who purposes to fall in love with life one day at a time. I understand now that looking for lovely was only step one. Step two is speaking life into the lives of others by choosing to draw attention to the good in the world and people.
I promise this Lifer mentality is not as complicated as it sounds. In essence, it just means turning yourself into a source for positivity. Pardon for a moment while I go vomit in my strawberry plant at the ridiculous cheesiness of this statement. I know it’s cliché, so hear me out because the truth of the matter is the world can be an exhausting, depressing, humiliating, disrespectful, disappointing place. I have tried venting frustration but never felt any better, worse actually. I have also done my best to broaden my attention to notice the small things of the world that are no less beautiful despite their lack of grandeur. While the elimination and implementation of habits and mindsets such as these have done immense good in my life and assisted in turning my heart into one that chooses understanding over anger and exasperation on a relatively consistent basis, I continue to find myself in want.
You know, come to think of it, an even better translation of the Lifer mentality is do for others what you want others to do for you. Up ‘til now, I have been a rather passive observer, jotting down the beautiful occurrences around me. While I will most definitely continue to do this, as a true Lovelian, I must also be a Lifer. Instead of allowing Survival Mode to flick on while I wait for my situation to become more pleasurable for me, I have the power to turn it beautiful myself through the uplifting words I say and the atmosphere I create by them.
I have experienced for myself the strengthening or draining effects of emotions and thoughts translated into words and spoken aloud. All words create. All of them. What they create inside a person depends on the speaker. Just bear in mind this invisible creation clings to your person like cigarette smoke, whether it be irritation or joy, and it’s contagious. The more words you speak, the more you and the people around you feel enlivened or irritable. Those in closest physical proximity to you become drenched remarkably quickly. Therefore, let us be Lifers.
So what exactly does this look like? Am I forever doomed to be tossed about by others? The second question can be answered by the first. In short, no. Others’ words are a strong influence, but an influence only. To combat a negative influence is, I am excited to tell you, actually a lot easier than you might think. I know I have taken rather…energetic approaches in the past, but they take more motivation to execute than I have in store at the moment. All it takes to become a Lifer is notice the beautiful and verbally draw attention to it. A real-life example: A woman shows up as a customer at work. I like her hair. I tell her that her hair is beautiful. Done. She lights up, and I am now her favorite person. Another example: I witness a heartwarming scene. Unless I feel this to be a moment from Papa God, a letter of love for my soul specifically addressed to me, I bring it home with me and share it. Those of you who are much wiser than I may clap now. Complicating life is an unfortunate habit of mine. So what say you? Shall you turn things beautiful with me?
Stay Curious, Olivia
P.S. Were you keeping track? Yes, I just referenced FIVE of my previous letters. Sue me.
Pay Attention. Be astonished. Tell about it.
------ Mary Oliver
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